My Anger Is Negatively Affecting My Life

by Jason F

Today I got fired from my job because of a bad secret shopper review. It was very busy at work. I was basically by myself and I got a little testy with a customer and his son. A secret shopper oversaw this and submitted a report to my company.

Even thought it's my fault I fantasize about physically assaulting that person. The regional manager and my general manager both told me that 95% of the time I give excellent customer service, but sometimes I give into my anger. It was the 2nd complaint about that in a year so they had to let me go.


This has been a problem my whole life. I've always had a short fuse. I took the anger test and answered yes to 18 of the questions. Really the only good thing about it is that I am able to walk away from a physical confrontation. That said I find myself getting into petty arguments with coworkers and often find myself thinking that people are idiots.

I sometimes become aggressive when things don't go my way. The other day I cussed a guy out because he called me a name over an argument over a pump at the gas station. I'm going to graduate from college in 2 years and I need to address this problem now so it doesn't effect my professional life.

Response from Dr. DeFoore

Hi Jason, and thanks for writing your story on this site. It is apparent that you are a smart person, because you want to deal with your anger problem to keep things from getting worse. Your "short fuse" doesn't match up with who you are inside, or how you want to be.

We need to find out what is behind your anger, and deal with that. Anger always exists for a reason, even though that may not be apparent when and how it shows up in your life.

Here is what I suggest:

1) Begin using these anger management techniques daily and repeatedly, until you start to feel increased control.

2) I also highly recommend that you use the exercises you will find described on this FAQ page, on a daily basis. It will serve you well in all you do.

You are apparently a bright young man, Jason. Take these recommendations seriously, follow all of the instructions, and you will receive great benefit that will serve you well the rest of your life.

You are also smart to act now, and not wait until things get worse.

My very best to you,

Dr. DeFoore