I'm Fourteen Years Old And Lost In The Anger

by Selena
(CA)

Okay, I can't do this any more. I swear it's the same thing every day. I fight & fight with everyone in this house.

I'm 14 years old. Yes, I know you may think she's only 14, but I swear I've got anger problems. I should know, I took your test on this site, and it says I need help and guidance.


I feel like I have a split personality. I don't know what to do. I can't live like this every day any more.

It's too much for a 14 year old to handle. If only you knew the stuff I go through on a daily basis. I know I sound stupid but I need help.

My anger is getting out of control and causing me to get into some bad problems.

Help me, please Dr.




Response from Dr. DeFoore

Hello Selena, and thanks for telling your story here. You don't sound stupid. You sound like a young person who wants to improve her life. You sound like a 14 year old who has a good head on her shoulders, and is smart enough to reach out for help when she needs it.

I don't know much about your situation, but I will give you some suggestions of what you can do about your anger.

First of all, you have good reasons for your anger, even though you may not know what they are. Do the writing exercises described on this page, to help you look at the ways in which you've been hurt, neglected, abandoned and abused in your past. Everybody's got some of this, and this is where your anger comes from.

You may have also learned it from some role models who showed a lot of anger while you were growing up.

Start a daily anger journal, and write in it as recommended on the journaling page, to give your anger a safe place to go. Your anger is trying to protect you--it's not bad. You just don't want to express it in ways that make things worse.

It will also help you a lot to start looking at the good things in yourself and your life. However bad things might be, there is always good if you look for it. The third journaling exercise covers this. This really works.

You are a good person, Selena. You have a good heart, and that's why you want things to be better. All of the anger doesn't match up with who you really are or what you want in life.

Believe in yourself and your good heart.

My very best to you,

Dr. DeFoore

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