When A Loving Guy Met A Volcano

by Bella
(Visalia, CA, USA)

I fell in love with this amazing guy 1 yr ago. My anger has been an issue for as long as I can remember. It really took off when we got serious.


I had never been in a serious relationship before so I didn't know what it was like to have someone care about you. When we fought my temper was high over stupid little stuff. I never thought it was a big deal until he pointed out to me that my temper was so bad he was going to take me to anger management.

I did not like the sound of that. So I finally jumped on the Internet to find out something about my anger. I took the test here and it turns out I need more help then we both thought. I have Anger Addiction, shortly meaning I look for a fight.

I don't think I do, but obviously from my test the results say this is what I have. I'm so lost because I don't know how it's gotten this bad. However I am speaking to someone soon to see if they can help me. I have a long road to recovery and hopefully I will realize it will be worth it.





Response from Dr. DeFoore

Hello Bella, and thanks for telling your story here. I respect your integrity that you showed by checking out your problem and deciding to get help.

It's not unusual for deep love to stir up old unresolved emotional issues--as a matter of fact it's quite common. That's one of the reasons so many people have trouble in their marriages.

In addition to the help you're getting, you might want to try the exercises described on this FAQ page. I think you will also get some helpful perspectives from this book: Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples.

Consider the possibility that you will be stronger and smarter as a result of getting to know yourself in this way. It could be one of the best things you've ever done for yourself.

My very best to you,

Dr. DeFoore

P.S. If you found this to be helpful, please consider making a donation to this site to support our mission to help you become your own best anger management resource.