• Where Is Your Focus?
• Change Your Feelings With Your Focus
• Pay Attention To What's Good, Right And Working
• Welcome To New Subscribers
• What's New on AngerManagementResource.com?

What Are You Focusing On?

You may not be aware of what you're focusing on, but I promise you it is extremely important. Once you start paying attention to this, you will have more choice, then you will have more control over your focus and your emotions.

The reason you may not be aware of what you're focusing on is that it is driven by your subconscious mind. You actually bring it from the subconscious to the conscious by paying attention to your focus and beginning to make decisions about it.

Let's look at how we get stuck in a negative, anger-producing focus:

• Things happen that you don't like. This starts early in life, and because we're vulnerable human beings in an uncertain world, it continues throughout life.


• You don't want any more of those bad things to happen, so you start watching for signs of them. You become vigilant, looking for evidence of more of the stuff you don't like. This is natural, and it happens to all of us.


• This instinctive, survival-based focus on the negative becomes your automatic default mechanism for focusing in your mind and in your everyday life.


• This hyper-vigilant focusing on negative things currently happening and about to happen can steal your joy and drive your anger through the roof.

While you may think you're just "telling it like it is," or "facing reality," what you're actually doing is creating your own reality with what you're focusing on.

For example, think of your true love, or your best friend. If you focus on what's wrong with them, and what you don't like about them, you will shut down your love and create anger and a desire to change them. On the other hand, if you focus on what you love about them and all of the positive aspects of who they are, you will find your feelings shifting, your anger subsiding, and your love beginning to return.

Here's what we're saying here...

"What you pay attention to grows bigger for you, the more you focus on it. When you focus on the good in your life, your heart will open, and when you focus on what you don't like, your heart will close." William DeFoore

You get to choose. The inner drive to focus on what's wrong, bad and broken is strong, but with time and effort, you can begin shifting your focus to what is good, right and working. This will help you feel the joy and the love that are your true nature.

Now for some methods and techniques for shifting your focus.

Change Your Feelings With Your Focus

Did you know that gratitude blocks toxic emotions such as resentment and anger? Based on the research of Dr. Robert Emmons, that is exactly what happens. That's a great example of shifting your focus to change your feelings.

The same is true of other positive ways of focusing, such as appreciation and optimism. When your mind starts to look at what's good, right and working, your stress goes down, and your anxiety and anger subside right along with it.

Sign Up Now To Receive Daily Goodfinding Emails

Here are some tools and methods for you:

• It's important to understand how the reptilian brain works. Because of survival and safety needs, your primitive reptilian brain will always look for problems and potential problems. This is natural.


• If you let this run all of the time, however, you will get stuck in a frustration and worry mode, and it will fuel your anger.


• Follow all of the steps on this page about soothing the reptilian brain, and you'll be on the road to claiming your focus and feeling better every day.


• The steps are basically relaxation, imagery, exercise and journaling. You can do this--get started now! You can use the powerful tool of your mental focus to manage your anger and all of your emotions...and create more joy in your life.

These are powerful insights and tools...but they will only work for you if you use them!

The more you use them, the better they will work for you, and the more skilled you will become.

This highly effective audio program, available as a CD or MP3 download, will help you manage your emotions successfully by looking for and focusing on what is good, right and working about you, your life and your circumstances.

Take advantage of the free previews, and the no-risk return policy that guarantees your satisfaction.

The Healing Anger Newsletter brings you a refreshing, helpful and upbeat approach to anger management and how it can work for you in every aspect of your life. Here is your chance to keep up with my (Dr. DeFoore here) latest discoveries and insights on anger management and how you can heal the anger in yourself, your family, your school and your workplace.

If you like this ezine, please do a friend and me a big favor and "pay it forward" by forwarding it to them. If a friend did forward this to you and if you like what you read, please subscribe by visiting the Healing Anger Newsletter subscription page.

Back to Top of Page

P.S. Why not make the rest of your life the best of your life? You can get started right now with Elegant Aging: Growing Deeper, Stronger and Wiser.